Rubbernecking, Social Media… and How I Can Get You LOTS & LOTS of Followers, Friends, Fans… and Porn Stars

Charlie Sheen, Gilbert Gottfried, UCLA Girl

Point your smartphone at this and call Michael Cheek

Are you a new brand that could use attention?

Are you an existing brand that could weather a storm?

I mentioned in the previous entry the old saying that “any press is good press” may not apply after the Dixie Chicks incident of 2003. However, if social media is ever the goal of your company, have I got a deal for you.

And you should seriously consider it since Facebook is now the number one destination of all web visitors today — even Google is now at number two. Moreover, social media has replaced porn as the most popular activity online.

Getting followers, friends and fans should be the goal of every business today.

Goal? Pshaw.

Any CEO or Chairman who has vision enough to see the commerce engine runs on these relationships forged in the digital spaces between cell phones, mobile tablets, computers and the consumers who use them. If your brand or brands don’t soon connect there, your company is up a creek sans paddle.

I’m not just saying that because I’m looking for work in this arena. I truly believe that the businesses who forge the first relationships in this space will be the next generation of big business.

So who’s ready?

Poor Aflac. Firing Gilbert Gottfried might have been the right step, but giving him the potential to gain more followers in social media while leaving your own company in the dust — well that’s just sad.  Gilbert’s approaching 100,000 Twitter followers. Aflac? Almost 9,000.

CBS certainly needed to rid itself of erratic Charlie Sheen but whatever network he ends up at next (or whatever he does online) he will get an initial attention. If he’s not entertaining, then he won’t succeed.

But will he lose the 3 million followers he’s got today? Probably not.

In fact, right now, I can’t think of anything anyone can do to actually lose followers.

There eventually will be the first Dixie Chick incident in social media. That will be the first time people wise up and abandon following, friending and becoming a fan of someone. It will be someday when the economic value of social media becomes apparent. Right now, most cannot see a dollar sign (euro, yen or any other currency) associated with any social media.

But it’s there.

That’s why the Dixie Chick protest worked. Not buying their music or attending their concerts or playing songs on the radio had a real, tangible impact.

For now, no one knows what that is for a Facebook friend or fan or a Twitter follow or a YouTube view.

Moreover, Americans are rubberneckers. We love to gawk at the horrible traffic accident as we go by. The lights and sirens are meant to get us out of the way, but it actually attracts our attention and slows us down so we can get a better look. We cannot turn away from the carnage.

Think of this past week. Two big news events were occurring. The clean-up and recovery from the earthquake and tsunami in Japan and Gadhafi’s attack and massacre of his own people. The human toll for both were horrible. However, almost every news program dedicated every single resource to Japan because they could get better video.

We could see the tragedy.

Libya is a closed society with close to impossible means to get reporters in and close to the fighting. Had it been Egypt on a similar path (with great video), the American thirst for scenic shooting and drowning cars and crying humans would have been sated by both competing for top of the newscasts. But not Libya. The grainy phone videos weren’t cutting it. So Libya disappeared for a while.

Social media is the ultimate is rubbernecking. We all get a front row seat. We’re all witnesses to Charlie Sheen crazy and UCLA girl rant and Gilbert Gottfried tasteless jokes (which are all of them).

Controversy and crazy, that will get you followers. You can be famous like Charlie Sheen — or an established brand that could take a little hit for a bit with enough time for a CEO or some other executive to come out with the appropriate mea culpa  on all the media outlets.

Or you can be an unknown like UCLA girl — or a new company looking to establish yourself with a great spokesperson to come out with the appropriate contrition on all the media outlets.

I’ll help you do it. Copyright me.

Of course, I have easier ways of getting to the top of social media outlets. But I can’t get you 3 million followers in about 20 days without something really crazy. Oh, and we’ll need porn stars. Lots of porn stars.

Published by

Michael Cheek

With more than 20 years of communication experience, Michael Cheek offers solid marketing expertise, especially in the digital frontier. He currently resides in Georgia but he's open to relocate anywhere the opportunities take him. Learn more at You can follow him on Twitter at and see more about his professional experience at Reach him via e-mail at

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